Sunday Morning Questions: Fireworks Edition

One of the annual events in the little community in which I live is a fireworks display around Independence Day, every year. From miles and miles around people congregate in the town park—across the street from where I live—and bring picnics so they can listen to the town band play John Phillip Sousa marches from a bandstand festooned with red, white, and blue ribbons. The local church serves lemonade and popcorn. Kids run around with sparklers. Then after dark, we're treated to about an hour's worth of fireworks over the town pond.

It's very, very New England.

In my much younger days I used to date a guy who was involved in the fireworks displays that used to take place over the baseball stadium near my parents' house in Virginia. Those were nothing like the ones here—a few straggling bursts of light and a lot of duds is what I remember about them.

But I recall complaining to the guy once about the fireworks I particularly disliked. The stadium seemed to have a lot of them, too—the kind of firework that would burst low in the air, produce nothing but a quick flash of bright light, and an immense, deadening boom. Spaced out, they might have been fine, I guessed. I found out from the guy I was fucking that they were intended to be filler, and were really supposed to be for sporadic effect. Not the soul-deadening, ear-splitting, obnoxious percussive assault accompanied by nothing of real interest that they turned out to be in that context. They were cheap, though, and that's why the stadium bought so many of them.

It occurred to me during this year's display that a lot of what I encounter on the internet is like those flashy, booming nothing fireworks. They attempt to make a loud noise. They call attention to themselves. They explode and request—nay, demand—that we take heed.

But you know, nobody likes them that much. Nobody attends the show saying, "Gosh, I hope they have those big obnoxious boomers this evening—and lots of them!"

When I see sites trying to produce an extreme reaction simply by making a big, loud noise, I don't think to myself, "Man, that guy knows how to put on a show!" I don't look forward to more of the same. People stir the pot solely to call attention to themselves, with the notion that a sensational notoriety is better than no attention at all. It's not. It's cheap, and when it's done again and again, it's ultimately dull, and soul-deadening.

Just one man's opinion. Don't take it as gospel. And as always, enjoy what you enjoy and don't let anyone else, including me, tell you otherwise.

Let's get to some questions from formspring.me.




What's your favourite underwear brand?

I tend to like Calvin Klein, just because they're durable and classic. For everyday wear, however, I tend to stick to Uniqlo.



have you ever slept with an inlaw would you sleep with an inlaw,have you ever slept with your kids friends parents or teacher

I can state with absolute certainty that I have totally slept with one of my kid's parents.


So we all know you're often up for a playful romp. Do you have any fetishes that some people might find unusual?

Some people find unusual and squicky activities that I find rather mundane, like rimming, so the answer to your question is an unqualified yes. I'm sure people would find some of the stuff I like unusual.

I enjoy—I really enjoy—having my feet serviced, for example. It's something that happens rarely, and which a lot of people would find super-kinky. I don't find it particularly kinky or taboo. Just pleasurable. Likewise with fisting, an activity that brings associations of men in leather chomping cigars in seedy barroom dark rooms. Many people consider it outrageous, invasive, and a sign of depravity. I find it very sensual, intimate, and an expression of love, respect, and trust between a man and his partner.

So I no longer pretend to be the arbiter of kink or unusual activities. They're all part of human expression, and thus of interest to me.


u need 2 cum 2 arsetralia i'll show you how real men bottom

U need 2 send me a plane ticket and put me up for a couple of weeks and we'll see about that.


When it's really hot outside, do you go outside barechested?

No, because my mother was susceptible to skin cancer, and I don't want to trigger anything by having my lard-white complexion exposed to the sun's direct rays.


dude, I feel like the line in "the hours" - like I'm unravelling. just had a bareback experience..felt good. strangely that one step of faith.. now gets me more confident and daring to try to hookup.

Taking a step in the direction you want to go—whether sexually, or in any other aspect of your life—is going to make you feel more confident, happier, and at one with the world.

I hope you realize from your experience that making yourself happy is within your means. And the same goes for anyone out there.