Friday, August 30, 2013


It's the last week of summer.* I'm feeling remarkably lazy. So here. Here's a photo of my dick, in lieu of an actual entry.

Well, okay, here's another.

Fine. Here's a link to a movie of me banging some whore in a hotel, I finally got around to uploading.

That ought to hold you through the weekend. Have a good Labor Day, everyone!

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Sunday Morning Questions: Chew It Edition

I’m not really a candy person. That is, I’m not going to turn up my nose at it. I don’t have a lingering neurotic fear of wrapped candy as the result of a childhood trauma involving a circus clown, a birthday piñata, and a Mexican donkey, or anything. But if you laid down an array of expensive hand-rolled truffles to my right, and a bowl of discount-brand Cheetos snack equivalent on my left, I’d walk away from the table with orange fingertips, fake cheese breath, and the plate on the right untouched. (Well. If there were a coffee-flavored truffle, I’d probably pause to Hoover that down my piehole.)

I make an exception for one particular brand of candy, though. In the last year I’ve become addicted to Chimes Ginger Chews—little sugar-dusted chunks of taffy-like goodness with a strong taste of crystallized ginger. I carry around in my man-bag a little tin with a supply of them; they’re good for satisfying any post-meal sugar cravings, they freshen my breath, and they also come in peanut butter flavor.

Secretly I suspect they’re probably about as healthy as M&Ms, but since they’re ginger flavored, I can pretend they’re all organic and natural and healthy and shit.

Many thanks to the reader who very kindly gifted me with a one-pound supply of the things from my Amazon Wish List! They’ll keep me (and my dentist) happy for months to come!

Let’s get to some questions from readers, courtesy of Or Whatever they’re calling themselves these days. If you've got questions you'd like to ask, either email them to me directly with a subject line of 'Sunday Morning Questions,' or use their site to submit them anonymously. I'm always grateful for the chance to talk about myself. Yet again.

Have you ever had music playing while fucking? Is there any kind of music that you find works well with or stimulates fucking? Does any music get you (even more) in the mood to fuck?

I'll come out and say it: I dislike music during fucking.

I am not fond of dance music during fucking. I don't like pop music while I fuck. I don't want to be listening to R&B or country music during a lovemaking session. And I really dislike guys who sing along to the music while we do it.

The only time I personally find music acceptable is if I'm about to bang someone in an apartment with paper-thin walls and I don't want the neighbors to hear the yelling. Then I'll turn that shit up.

What actor would you like to play you in the story of your life?

I'm going with Bradley Cooper. Because we're practically twins.

Did your family eat around a single table when you were little?

Although they were unconventional in a lot of ways, my parents were very strict about having a sit-down dinner at the table, with no television, and polite conversation of a general nature. I can only think of a handful of occasions when we didn't eat all together until I left for college.

Mind you, after about the age of ten, I was cooking about half the meals, since my mom hated preparing dinners and both my parents were often working in the late afternoons. So they weren't THAT old-school.

I was revisiting your Landscaper series and was curious about how you two got in contact, as it's not really revealed in the first piece. Do you still meet up with him and might you right more about him in the future?

Yes, absolutely I still meet with the Landscaper. It's not frequently, exactly, because after each meeting it takes his internal clock a while to reset to a point where he desperately needs the man-to-man contact again. We originally met when I answered an ad of his on Craigslist.

I have not been writing about these encounters, though, for three reasons.

The first, and simplest, is that there's a sameness to what goes on in the meetings. I tend to want to write about encounters that bring a little something new to the table, either sexually or interpersonally. There have been a couple of developments with him of a minor nature that I would write about . . . save for the two reasons below.

The second reason is that when I write about the Landscaper, there's a very small (but VERY vocal) contingent of readers who immediately write in tsk-ing and tut-tut-ing comments that accuse me of 'exploiting this poor man's internalized homophobia' or other similar nonsense.

I've got two responses to that. The first is: FUCK YEAH I AM! That's what makes it hot, bitches.

And the second, more reasoned (but no less sincere) response is that I would posit I'm giving this guy, who obviously has never, ever allowed himself to pursue with men the physical intimacy he so very obviously craves, a safe space to explore his sexuality.

I'm not going to stalk him. I'm not going to blackmail him. I'm not going to endanger his relationship, or beat him up and rob him. I'm not urging him to leave his wife and kids and leap into a relationship for which he's clearly not ready and doesn't want to be pressured. I'm not pushing him to do anything he's not ready to do. In fact, though I'm ostensibly the 'trade' in this situation, I'm letting him call the shots from meeting to meeting. We haven’t verbalized it, but he keeps returning to me because he understands every single one of those things.

I give him an amazing time, and he gets the outlet he wants and needs. If that's exploitation, it's of the very mildest kind. Furthermore, I would ask the moralists who make it their business to pout and throw tantrums whenever I write about the Landscaper: where are you guys when I'm tossing out racial epithets during some in-bed roleplaying with minority bottoms? Or when I'm butching it up with gay guys who are fascinated with my marital status? Or when I’m letting some young guy call me ‘daddy’ as I’m impaling his ass?

The self-appointed critics are, to a man, okay with me treating gay guys as sexual fodder. It seems that once I throw the Landscaper into the mix, however, suddenly well-off white straight men are an endangered species who must be protected from me at all costs. And that disparity strikes me as self-loathing, on their parts.

There's a third reason I've stopped writing about the Landscaper, and that's because at the other extreme, some readers are way too overly vocal about wanting more entries from him. It's not as grating as the second reason, but it's a little tiresome to write a hot entry about some other sexual encounter and the only comments I get are along the lines of "This is hot and all but what happened to the Landscaper?"

The name of this site is not The Landscaper's Blog. I would like to compose more entries about him, but the conditions have to be right.

Hey man . . . gotta tell you, I'm a bit jealous of your scoring record. While I keep drawing a blank. I'm pretty good looking, but don't photograph well, well all the self-pics come out so weird, that I wouldn't fuck myself . . . get the drift? What gives!

I'd suggest that you take the time to figure out how to take better selfies. If you're taking your own photos and they're not turning out well, you've really only got yourself to blame. It's not as if your digital camera or your phone camera is going to run out of film, right?

Friday, August 23, 2013

After the Party #1: Total Trade

He’d arrived late to that party I’d attended, earlier in the summer. The room had been as pitch black as the host could make it, noontime in a cheap hotel room with shabby drapes. Like vampires caught mid-feast, we’d recoiled from the blast of sunlight and froze in a tableau on the bed. When the door opened I was balls-deep inside the state trooper, his legs over my shoulder, my hand over his mouth to keep him quiet, while someone or another ate my ass.

Then I saw this guy come in. Pete, I later found out his name was. Thrown into silhouette by the sun, he seemed immediately the most attractive man in the room—and with a bald muscle pup and a built black guy and a state trooper arguing over my dick, that was some pretty stiff competition. He had the build of a construction worker. Broad shouldered. Worked-out arms. Narrow waist. Long surfer’s hair.

The door had closed. He stared at me. Then he’d removed his shorts and his T-shirt, taken his already-hard dick in his hand, and walked over to where I knelt on the bed with my dick shoved up the cop’s hole. Then he’d pulled my head to his, given me a surprisingly soft and gentle kiss, and then maneuvered me down to his dick.

I’d melted at that.

I want Pete, I’d written the host after the party. Give him my email or my profile or something.

You are barking up the wrong tree there, the host wrote back. He’s even more top than you. He’s total trade.

Don’t care, I wrote back. I just want more of his dick.

In his email back the host had given me a written shrug. Okay, but you’re just going to be disappointed if you want to fuck him.

I figured I could live with that disappointment, if it meant getting that man’s hog in my mouth again. I don’t mind servicing trade. Especially handsome trade like that.

He’s married, though. And I’m married. Neither of us can host that often, so hooking up for a second go-round, one-on-one, has been difficult. But here it is, an afternoon when the family’s not due back until midnight, and he’s actually free. I’m reminded of that afternoon in the hotel when he gets out of his car and strides up my walk. I’m sitting on the front porch in a T-shirt and a pair of thin sweat shorts, no underwear, hard at the prospect of seeing him again. And he’s still as burly and handsome as before. His hair is long and curly and hangs down to his shoulders; he’s got on a flannel shirt with the sleeves cut off and a pair of khakis. I push down my boner from inside my pockets, greet him warmly, and lead him into my home.

Once we’re inside, I put a hand on his chest. Through the flannel I can feel his heart beating. He looks at me with his big blue eyes and says his first words to me: “I’m kind of nervous.”

They take me aback. “Why?” I ask. “You know me already.”

“Barely,” he says. We stand still for a moment in my living room. It’s a warm afternoon. A breeze blows through the windows and open door. We stare at each other, and then he reaches up to pull my head down to his again. We kiss.

I go with the assumption he’s not as nervous any longer, after that.

I take him back to the bedroom. Sit down on the bed. Unbuckle his belt, undo the khakis. He’s not wearing any underwear either. His dick is soft, hooded with foreskin. He starts to unbutton his shirt when I bend down to suck him. His hands settle on the back of my head, holding it gently, cradling it. When I back off a half-minute later, he’s rock hard.

I stand up and maneuver him onto the bed. I make sure he has a pillow beneath his head. Then I spread his legs and sprawl between them, so I can go to work on his dick. “I just want to make you feel good,” I tell him before I go down on him again. “Anything you want.” It’s an honor to be taking this man’s cock; he’s just fucking handsome. I want to take him so he’ll be in my system. If he’s in my mouth, down my throat, he’s part of me. Simple as that.

And it’s a great dick. It’s not huge by any means, but I love the ample foreskin, the fatness of it, the generosity of his head and its obscene veininess. It throbs and jumps in my mouth as I fellate him. I know I’m doing well when it releases little tastes of precum on the back of my tongue. “Not yet,” he says suddenly, as he pries my head off of him. When I look up, he’s panting. He’s got a short trigger, this one. I hadn’t realized. I hadn’t been the one to get his load at the party.

Then he gets aggressive. He pushes me back, makes me get on my knees. He yanks off my t-shirt, pulls down my sweat shorts. My dick flops out lewdly and strikes the mattress. Then he wheels around and lands on his stomach. I feel his hot breath on my meat, and then his mouth surrounding me.

“No,” I say, shocked. This is the guy who hadn’t sucked any cock at the party. He’d been total trade, content to let man after man service him. “You don’t have to—“

But he’s not doing it out of obligation. He’s sucking me because he wants to. He’s cramming my whole cock down his throat, even though it’s pushing him to his limits and beyond. When he looks up at me, his eyes are brimming with tears from the effort. His face is red. His hair is spilling over his face and he’s still looking up at me, judging my reaction to his cocksucking.

It’s good. I’m so totally flabbergasted that this sexy brute is sucking my dick—and sucking it well—that I groan and gasp a little. This position isn’t the best, but so long as it keeps my dick in his mouth, I’m not moving. I let him slobber over me for a little bit until he comes up for air. Then he shocks me again.

“Would you ever consider fucking me?” he asks.

I’m not even sure I’ve heard the words right. In fact, I figure what he really said is that he wanted to fuck me. But no, I realize that’s not how it came out. “What?” I say.

“Would you . . . fuck me?” Then, in the softest coda I’ve ever heard, he adds, “Please.”

I’m stunned. “Really?” He nods, almost as if he’s embarrassed to be asking. My cock hardens even more than it was before. A surge of possessiveness and top aggression starts to surge through my veins.

“You want my big dick in you?”

“Yes. I want your big dick in me,” he repeats. He’s speaking so softly that I can barely hear him.
I know when to take advantage of an opportunity, though. I nod. I turn him over. I spread his legs, and pry open his butt. My tongue flicks out. Licks it. Tastes the mixture of sweat and soap smell and the metallic tang of his inner ass. He wraps his arms around the mattress corner and hangs on as I eat harder, deeper. Whether or not I get in there, I’m going to relish eating out this man’s hole.

And I do, for long minutes. Then I reach for my lube, and apply a quarter’s worth onto his hole. Another quarter’s worth goes inside, pushed in by my index finger. I can already tell he’s tight. So fucking tight. Maybe even first time tight.

That realization just makes my dick harder.

I rub the head on his hole. “You like that?” I ask. He grunts. I let my fleshy head bounce in and out of his hole. I’m using the gentlest of fucking motions. Not pushing at all. Very gradual. The fact I’m rock hard at the thought of topping this top, of getting the impossible, is turning me on like crazy. When I’m sliding back and forth now, he’s taking the head and an inch. The head and an inch and a half. The head and two inches.

Bit by bit, increment by increment, he’s opening for me. And he’s loving it. “You okay?” I ask periodically.

“Yeeeees,” he groans out.

“Have you had dick in there before?” I demand to know.

“Not . . . like this,” he pants out. “Not your size.”

Good. The news pleases me. I’m a competitive top. The news should surprise no one.

It’s about four inches in that we start to run into problems. I no longer have to hang onto my dick to make sure it doesn’t splay out at an angle as I fuck; I’m definitely in him. I could even fuck to completion at this depth. I’ve done it with less. But I want to be all the way inside him, and we have to get past that inner ring. I push.

“Whoa,” he says, startling as he realizes what I’m doing.

“Ssshh,” I say, reassuring him with kisses on his shoulders.

“It—“ I know he wants to tell me it hurts. But he doesn’t want to discourage me, either.

“It’s okay,” I tell him. “Just enjoy it.”

He grimaces as I continue to push. There’s a massive amount of resistance. And then I’m through. My final four inches slide into him smoothly, as if they belong. Pete’s head lolls and I hear him take a sharp breath.

“Am I hurting you?” I ask him.

“No,” he says. Then again. “No. Not at all!” There’s a sense of wonder in his voice.

I take that as permission to fuck.

In and out I slide. With every thrust, his hole opens more. Maybe he hasn’t bottomed much. Maybe he hasn’t bottomed at all. But he’s responding like some of the hardened whores I fuck, grunting with pleasure and animal lust when I get all the way in, clamping down on me and refusing to let me out when I piston back. “You like it,” I tell him. “You like it, don’t you?”

“Yes,” he whispers. His brow is furrowed; his eyes are clamped close. At my question he opens them and looks back at me. “I love it.”

“You love my big dick fucking you.”

“I love your big dick fucking me,” he agrees.

Yeah, he really does. He’s pushing back when I thrust now, trying to move his hips, give it up to me and make it good. The big old top who never gets fucked is my bitch. And he fucking loves it.
He shoots when I position him on his knees and milk the load out of him with my hand. It only takes a few strokes. His guts contract around me and threaten to suck in my junk, nuts and all. Then I pump my load inside him, squirt by squirt. “Thank you,” he murmurs as I breed him. “Thank you. Thank you.”

It’s the sweetest whisper I’ve ever heard.

We collapse to the bed together. “Don’t pull out,” he begs. I remain on top of him, my dick still swollen and wet from lube and sperm. For a few moments we pant and breathe. Then finally he lets out the longest sigh I’ve heard in ages. “So that’s what it’s all about,” he says, sounding half-asleep.

Yup. That’s what it’s all about.

And I’m fucking proud to have shown him.

Monday, August 19, 2013

Home Gloryhole

Do you like gloryholes? he asks me on a sex site.

No, I shoot back. I fucking LOVE gloryholes.

Then you should try my home gloryhole sometime, he writes back. Conveniently located near Times Square.

I look at the clock in my living room. I was just about to leave to catch the train into the city, in fact. Fifty minutes for the ride, a half-hour for a quick lunch, ten minutes for walking. . . . I’m going to be in that area in ninety minutes.

He sends me an address. I copy and paste it into in my contacts. I use Gloryhole for his surname. Home for his first.

So here’s the setup. He’s in a seven-story building on a busy street in the east forties. It’s one of those doorways I wouldn’t even notice if I weren’t looking for it, wedged as it is in between commercial storefronts and restaurants. I ring the bell, he buzzes me in, I walk up to his floor. Each floor has only one apartment; the only door there is ajar.

I step through. Shut it behind me. Let the latch click. There’s a solid wall on my left. An opening to the right that has black fabric tightly stretched across it to keep out intruders. Then, directly across from the doorway, a six-foot stretch of drywall. Right at dick level is the hole. It’s oval, about four inches high. Smooth around the edges.

It’s a professional setup. He’s bolted a long pipe—a plumbing fitting—into the wall right at the level of my forehead. I see a single ring hanging at the far end. I instantly deduct how this stark room with the hole looks when he’s not stripped down, mouth open, behind it. Curtains, probably, to hide the hole and break up the monotony of the wall. Maybe a little table to discourage people from lifting it up and discovering the gaping vacancy right at waist level. Art hanging from the hangers I can discern on the left-hand wall. A proper little foyer for an expensive midtown apartment.

Not an anonymous dick delivery system for a cocksucker.

I’ve already shoved my sunglasses and wallet into my bag. I let it fall to the ground with a thud. I step up to the hole. See him beyond. Squatting. Ready. Even through the narrow hole I can see that his body is beyond muscular. It’s a Men’s Health magazine body. He’s shirtless. His hand is inserted into the fly a pair of madras shorts. I see a shadow approach the hole. He’s looking through. Mouth open.

He’s ready.

I step up. Unbutton. Unzip. Pull down the waistbands of my jeans and shorts simultaneously. I’m wearing the thickest and heaviest of my cock rings. It weighs down my nuts, makes my dick flop out and swing. Then I step up to the hole and insert my junk right through.

There’s a pause. I imagine he’s looking at me, planning his attack. I feel my dick lift. There’s a slight breeze on the top of my balls. Then I feel wetness around my soft cock, and warmth around the base. I’m in.

His mouth is so soft and wet, and his tongue action so gentle that I can’t pinpoint the moment I go from soft to hard. All I know is that suckling sensation all around my meat, insistently nursing it to fullness. When that happens, he starts up and down the shaft. I feel his lips travel, slowly, insistently, deliberately, along every one of my inches. He’s in no hurry; he’s making each trip from base to glans last. He’s savoring the taste of my flesh—flicking in and out of the slit when he reaches the top, nuzzling against my pubes at the bottom.

I can tell I’m in good hands. Or a good mouth, anyway. I grab the bar from beneath, push my body against the wall, and relax.

I don’t know how many minutes I’m there. It seems like an eternity. He does this thing where he clamps his mouth down on my dick, gets me going so hard that my whole body’s shaking. If it weren’t for my grip on the pipe above, I’d probably fall to the floor. I’m trembling, I’m bucking so hard into the wall that my knees make it resound with deep, percussive thuds. “Please,” I croak out.

Then he’ll stop, leaving me gasping for more.

He’s got it down to a science. He knows how to give me enough to make my body shake and quiver. When he stops, my dick is wet and red and angry that the cocksucker’s not finishing me off. He could finish me off so easily. He knows it. That’s why he’s torturing me like this. Fucker.

Two can play at that game. Still hanging onto the bar, I lean back, let my body fall into a long S-shape. My engorged cock is on my side of the hole now. I can see he’s got his pants open. His fat, short dick is out; his forearm is busy beating it. His jaw approaches the hole, rubs against it like a cat marking his territory. It’s a strong chin with a two-day growth of stubble. I’m kind of wondering at this point if it belongs to a face I’ve seen on the screen before, large or small. A personal gloryhole would be a good outlet for someone known to indulge in his favorite sport.

I don’t really care to whom that mouth belongs, though. I just like the look of it, lips protruding and begging for my dick. I give him the tip. He responds hungrily. I pull out. My turn to tease. A little tip more before I swing back again. Then I’m feeding him the head, backing out, and pushing it back in. I’m using his mouth as a fuckhole, and it’s as wet and hungry as most of the boys I drill.

Finally he’s getting it all. He handles my inches like a pro as I drive into the back of his throat. He doesn’t need his hands; he’s got his mouth to get me off. By the time I’m thrust all the way through hole, he’s using his throat like a pussy and getting my body shaking again. I’ve got sweat soaking the back of my head; my armpits are dark spots on the fabric of my shirt. “Please,” I whisper. “Please. Please!”

I don’t know whether or not he hears my begging. Doesn’t matter. I get what I want. My cock erupts almost painfully, tossing ropes of seed down his open throat. I hear him grunt on the other side of the wall, feel his lips widen to take more of me in. Feel his throat swallow around my shaft. For what seems an eternity I blast away into that unseen mouth. When I come to, I’m hanging from the pipe with weak hands and feeling him nurse the very last drops onto his broad, flat tongue.

I withdraw. Take a breath. Try to stuff my still-stiff cock and balls into my pants. Zip it down tightly, and pick up my bag. “Thanks, buddy,” I say to the figure still crouched on the other side of the hole.

No reply.

No worries. I wasn’t there to listen to the guy talk. He’s got better things to do with that mouth. Damn, that mouth. Twenty-four hours later and I’m still thinking about that mouth.

Friday, August 16, 2013


There’s a long and twisting flight of stairs to take to Rock Star’s wing in the house where he lives. As softly as I try to tread, my rubber soles against the shiny varnish on the wooden steps echoes like gunfire, every time I creep up to his room.

Every time I open the door at the summit, I never know what’s going to lie behind. I’ve swung it back to find him dozing beneath the sheets, his long hair spilling over the ivory comforter like an inky river. I’ve stepped through to find him on all fours wearing nothing but a jock, head in the pillows, hole begging for attention. I’ve been pulled by a wet and slippery hand from the threshold into the bathroom adjoining, to entwine with his soaked limbs beneath the steamy waterfall of the shower head. I never know what to expect. It’s like opening the door on an old Mystery Date board game—only there’s never a dud.

The air in the stairwell is as hot as still as the summer weather outdoors. When I step through the doorway, I’m almost directly in front of his window air conditioner. Rock Star is nowhere to be seen. There’s no sound of running water from the bathroom. He’s not arrayed on the mattress for my pleasure. Then my senses kick into overdrive as I sense someone behind me; the shock of knowing someone’s over my shoulder is colder than the air conditioner’s blast.

It’s Rock Star, my brain tells my body. Don’t worry. But it’s too late. My skin has erupted into gooseflesh; the microscopic hairs on the back of my neck are standing straight up. My heart starts to race from the unexpected surprise of having him sneak up on me. Then it pounds simply because I feel his hands on my shoulders, his breath beneath my hairline.

I start to turn, to take him into my arms. “Ssshh,” he says, arresting my twisting motion. “Close your eyes.”

“What?” I laugh.

“Just ssshh. Keep your eyes closed.” When he whispers, it stirs the already-alert hairs on my nape. They tingle and send chills down my arms, along my spin, around my sides and down to my cock. It stirs in my shorts. I feel the brush of something against my face. When I open my lids, I see him lowering one of his bandanas over my face. I smile, and close my eyes again. He tightens the makeshift blindfold, and knots it in the back. “Can you see?” he says, moving from one ear to the other.

When I peek again, I can. The bandana is light in color and hangs over my nose. I can look down the bridge and see him steering me in the direction of the bed. “No,” I tell him, closing my eyes again. “I can’t see.”

“Good,” he tells me, stopping me short of the mattress. I feel it press against my shins. “I’ve wanted to do this for a while.”

His voice is soft. He holds me on my biceps; his hands are warm on my arms. I relax. I trust him. I let him do what he wants.

I feel his hands undo the buttons of my shirt. I let him pull it from my arms. His palms run up and down my rib cage, warm where the air conditioner cools my skin. I feel him unbuckle my belt, tug on my shorts. They’re too big for me as it is; he doesn’t even have to unbutton the fly to make them fall to my ankles. One after the other he lifts my feet, removes my shoes and socks. I’m naked save for the blindfold.

For a few moments his hands seem to brush over all the parts of my body. My buttocks, between my thighs, my belly, my chest. His fingers trace circles over my shoulders; I feel his kiss against my cheek. “I love you, and want to make you feel good,” he says, as I feel his mouth on my nipple, my abdomen, at the crease of my pelvis. “I have to give back a small portion of what you’ve given me.”

“Sweetheart,” I say helplessly. We’ve had this conversation before. “You give me so—ah.” I lose the train of my thought as I feel his mouth nuzzle my balls. I try to resist reaching out to guide his head. He wants to be firmly in command here. “You always—“ I sigh as I feel him part my legs, run his hand down my taint to my hole, then back to a sensitive spot at the very back of my balls. “You always—fuck.”

He’s got my member in his mouth, now. In one rotation of his tongue it grows from half-mast to fully erect. “I love this cock,” he tells me. “It’s the perfect cock.”


“Shut up,” he says.

I shut up. Very gently he turns me around, only to push me so that I land on the bed. I feel his hands on my thighs. Roughly he parts them, and goes back to his sucking. Rock Star’s mouth is sweet, and soft, and warm; it’s an ideal combination for oral sex. When I try to lift my hands and stroke his hair, he pushes them back down again.

“My cock,” he says, letting my dick drop with a wet slap onto my abdomen. “Fuck whatever you want with it, but it’s my cock. Belongs to me,” he growls. I can tell by his tone of voice that he’s seriously aroused. It’s the tone of a man in serious heat, who can’t think of anything but flesh and pleasure. “Whose is it?”

“Yours,” I say, weakly. I know that if I looked at my dick, it would be raging and red. In his clutch it strains. I like the sensation.

Mine,” he agrees.

I whimper, and sink back into the pillows.

I hear the lube before I feel it, when the plastic bottle clatters against his nightstand. His weight shifts, and suddenly he’s slapping on cold fluid and warming it with his hand. My dick points to the ceiling; I feel him position first his feet, and then his knees on either side of my hips. I feel the pressure of him as his ass seeks to locate my tip. His large hand wraps around my shaft to hold it steady. Then he’s lowering himself onto me, and I groan. “Please,” I beg, when he stops halfway.

He’s teasing me. Squeezing with his hole, moving up and down in the most minuscule increments possible. Making me want more, but denying it. “Whose dick?” he asks again.

“Yours,” I say, in more strangled tones. I try to reach up to him, but he shoves away my hands. As punishment, he pivots up and off my dick. I make sounds of frustration in the back of my throat. But then I hear him applying lube to himself. He’s back on my dick, sliding this time all the way down to the bottom.

“I’ve been thinking about this dick all week,” he grunts out as he begins riding up and down. “I’ve been wanting this dick all week. And you’ve been keeping it from me.” He’s rocking his hips up and down at the base of me, grinding my dick like it’s some kind of toy. He’s tight. He’s always been tight. But today he’s latching down on me with a firmness I didn’t expect. He’s implanted on my dick, and plainly isn’t coming off until he’s done.

I don’t care what he says. This fuck isn’t for my pleasure—though let’s be honest, I’m getting a lot of pleasure out of it. It’s all for him. He’s treating me like his plaything, and it’s turning me the fuck on to be used like that. I can tell he’s slicked up his own meat and is beating at it furiously. When I take a little peek down my nose and under the kerchief, I can see his hand flying up and down over his dick.

“Asshole,” he says, shoving me by the forehead backward. “Cheater. Stop trying to look.” Before I can apologize or protest, his mouth is on mine. His kisses are hard and relentless. I want to grit my teeth and punish him; I want to flip him over and pound the fuck out of him just to show him who’s boss. But part of the sweetness of this scenario is that he’s the boss, here. He’s the one who has the power—the power to excite, the power to consummate.

“I’m sorry,” I say.

“You better bet you’re sorry.” He’s back to riding me in smooth, sinuous movements. His hips slide, snake-like, back and forth. “Fuck. Maybe I won’t let you juice me.”

“Please,” I say. My throat is already parched; my lips feel cracked and dry. “Please let me.”

“No,” he says, like a querulous child.

“Please.” I’m begging.

“No. Not yet.” He’s going faster and faster, seated on the stiff locus of pleasure that’s my dick. When I get too close, though, he clamps down; he stops. He takes me to the edge, again and again, but never steps over.

Then he shoots. I don’t know it’s happening until I hear his gasps, hear the sound of him crying out and feel his nuts bouncing up and down on my midsection. Then I feel hot splashes of liquid as he covers me in his seed. He’s making sounds I’ve never heard from him before—hoarse and guttural, from deep within his core.

The rocking subsides. He’s still astride me, but he’s leaning on my chest, breathing heavily. Recovering. I’m almost afraid to break the hush, to speak and interrupt the patterns of his breathing. So I lie there, waiting for him to tell me what’s next.

“My cock,” he finally says, giving me a vise-like squeeze with his ass muscles. Then I feel his mouth cover mine, and his chest press against my own. The seed he’s spilled glues the two of us tightly together. “All mine.”

I’m happy to let him have the last word on that topic.

Sunday, August 11, 2013

Sunday Morning Questions: The Felching Edition

One of the more annoying things I do in a social situation—though to my slight credit, I usually wait until people know me slightly, so they catch on that it’s a joke—is to pretend ignorance of sexual slang, just so I can get a giggle out of watching someone try to explain it to me. Last night, for example, I was at a potluck with a bunch of gay guys and someone was looking at a picture of Sam Elliott in his early-eighties heyday wearing a sleeveless T bearing the legend MUSTACHE RIDES.

I crunched my eyebrows, screwed up my face, looked at the guy with the photo on his cell, and asked, “What is a mustache ride?”

“SERIOUSLY?!” he shrieked. Then, when my expression didn’t change, he started stammering, “Well, when a guy has a mustache, and he um, gives oral sex to someone, it’s called . . . OH YOU FUCKER.”

Because by mid-sentence, of course, I will be giggling like a Japanese teenaged girl and the proverbial jig will be up. Later that night, the same guy was telling a story about going to a straight strip club for a colleague’s birthday party and how one of the strippers did an acrobatic stunt that ended with her muff in his mouth. While everyone was laughing at the tale, I stopped it briefly. “Now, by muff, do you mean one of those fur accessories women insert their hands into to keep them warm in the winter?”

Automatically, just because I have one of those faces that would never, ever lead anyone astray, he started to stammer out again, “Um, a muff is a. . . . A muff is. . . .” Then he remembered the mustache rides incident of earlier, laughed at himself, and yelled at me, “Yes, her muff was a circular hand-warming fur, because I WENT TO A STRIP CLUB FOR GOD-DAMNED VICTORIAN ICE SKATERS.And we all laughed about that one.

So late in the evening, a bunch of the guys were playing some Cards Against Humanity/Apples to Apples-like party game tailored to gay guys, in which in response to a question, everyone around the table has to hand in a card with a comic response. (Apparently ‘double-headed dildos’ will win every time.) I was standing behind a friend watching the game proceed, when the friend started reading out cards in response to his question, What’s that dripping sound? “A lesbian wedding. . . .” he said, flipping over the first response. “Pat Robertson’s dentures. . . .” he read, to minor titters around the table. “Fletching. . . .”

He’d already started to toss that card on the table when I stopped him. “Felching, sweetie,” I said. “Fletching is something you find on an arrow.”

He looked at the card again. “What’s felching?”

“Oh, ha, ha, ha,” I replied, thinking he was trying to pull one over on me. “I’m not fooled that easily, mister.”

“What?!” he asked. “What’s felching? I’m serious.”

“Mm-hmm,” I said, playing along.

“No, I mean it!”

Then I realized that he did indeed mean it. “Felching is when one ejaculates inside another’s anus or vagina and then licks it out,” I told him.

In the way that gay guys do when confronted with real-world mention of an act that they’ve secretly gotten off to while watching internet porn countless times but don’t want to admit it, every man in the room went ewwww! or gross! My friend with the cards, however, looked at me with horror on his face. “How do you even know what that is?”

I shrugged. It’s a rough job, being perpetually innocent.

Let’s get to some responses to questions I’ve received recently. If you’ve got questions of your own to ask, either leave them at my site, or email them to me at the address in the sidebar. I appreciate the thoughtfulness of the questions I often get—they give me the chance to spout off on topics I wouldn’t normally address in my blog.

Does sex always involve intimacy?

Nope. A lot of sexual transactions feel less intimate than withdrawing cash from an ATM.
But a lot of the best sex involves intimacy.

Are you generally more interested in sex in the spring?

July is the month in which my hormones suddenly shift into overdrive. Yes, even more than usual.
I figured out the pattern when, a few Julys ago, I was ready to write an entry in my journal about how inexplicably horny I'd been. Before I started typing it out, though, I had a vague memory of writing something similar the year before. Sure enough, I'd written a "Why am I so horny?" entry in July. There were other July horniness entries in my journals for several different years.

Sometimes keeping a journal over a long period of time helps to identify these patterns. But it still doesn't get anyone on my dick any quicker, come 7/1, yo.

Hi, this is Jim. Long time reader. You mention having great success with instagram. How does that work in finding guys?

Hey Jim. I don't believe I ever said I had 'great success' finding guys on Instagram. However, I have had regular old economy-sized success. Considering that the g-rated photo-sharing service of Instagram is not intended in the least to be used for picking casual sex partners, I suppose any kind of success there at all is a great success.

There's a whole subculture on Instagram of guys who take photos of themselves for other guys and gals to admire. They don't take art photos. They don't take photos of their vacations to post. They stand in front of a mirror, point their camera phones at themselves, and snap shots of their muscles. The photos are shirtless, often. They're pretty photos of pretty men.

I don't take a lot of these photos myself—I take and share the arty crap—but I do follow a handful of the men and boys who do. And by handful, I mean dozens. There have been a several times when I have commented on these photos and found my comments met with an encouraging response. A couple of times these encouraging responses have come from local guys. Men within driving distance. And on those couple of occasions, I ended up getting together with the guy when I pointed out how close we were.

If that's great success, I'll still take it.

What is something you remember happening when you were in Grade 1?

I lived close enough to my first grade school that I walked to it in the mornings from home. My dad would make my lunchbox, then get me across the street to the baseball field that separated our apartment complex from the school, and then watch as I made my way across the field to the school's back entrance.

One morning, we were late in getting me off. I don't mean five minutes late. I mean, laaaaaaate. Maybe my dad overslept, maybe something adult was going on that I wasn't aware of—but I remember being woken up and crammed into my clothes and dragged out the door with my lunchbox banging at my knees, and then propelled against that baseball field toward the school.

But when I got to the door, it had been locked. Apparently they did that, after all the kids were inside. I looked back to see if my dad was still watching, but he'd gone home. So in a panic, I had to go all the way around the school, trying doors. Which were all locked. It was only when I finally got around to the front door about fifteen minutes later that I was able to get into the building at all.

When I got to the classroom, I was red-faced, panicked, and sweaty. The teacher shushed my excuses and made me sit in the back of the classroom as a punishment.

It's been forty-three years and whenever I'm late to something—anything—I flash back to that day in first grade and I'm that little boy with the lunchbox and the fear in his eyes all over again.

Given your enjoyment of Gilligan's Island, do you think the TV series Lost should have ultimately been revealed to be a Gilligan's Island spin-off series?

First off, let me reassert that my enjoyment of Gilligan’s Island was limited to my prepubescent years. For adults, the show is pretty much unwatchable. If I have to watch Bob Denver, give me the smart and bittersweet Dobie Gillis every time.

Now, about Lost. I think any resolution would've been better than that load of steamin' doo-doo I wasted five years of my life watching. I am still somewhat angry that a show that started with such promise devolved by the third season into something I was simply shrugging my indifferent shoulders to (time travel to the 1970s? Okay. Nuclear bomb? Sure, why not? Crazed chess-playing gods who never appeared in any other season? Might as well be, I suppose). Lost and Battlestar Galactica taught me that simply because I want a science fiction series to be as good as its original premise doesn’t justify the hours and DVR space I put into it, when it’s obvious it’s going down the toilet.

I learned that lesson well, believe you me. I ditched Once Upon a Time and Revolution and Falling Skies the minute they grew tiresome, and haven’t had a regret about it.

Friday, August 9, 2013

Man Up and Shut Up

I’m in a hotel that’s only five minutes from my house. It’s the first place I stayed after I discovered I was moving here from the midwest; it’s the first place on that same trip I banged one of the locals. Whenever I get a chance to fuck here, I take it. The parking’s free, the trip’s quick, and by and large, any guy who spends the night in this budget establishment isn’t looking for an everlasting romance. Just for a dick in his slutty hole.

And this guy’s slutty. Hot looking. Muscular. Smooth flesh. He’s wearing nothing but a jock, and he’s assumed the position on the mattress: legs spread, butt high in the air, his nose buried in a bottle of poppers. Just the way I like ‘em. The jock is old and stretched out. When I grab it like a pair of reins and pull his ass to my glistening, lubed-up cock, I can tell the elastic has seen better days.

But fuck. That hole. It’s perfect. It was already greasy with Vaseline when I rubbed some of my own lube into it. The mixture makes my dick slimy as I push into that hole. It’s warm. It’s loose. I can tell this is going to be a hot fuck. I crunch the elastic into a ball in my hand and swat him across the ass a couple of times with the loop of it hanging out the top. He grunts, and groans, and pushes back against my hips to take all my inches.

“You like that?” I growl.

“Yeah,” he replies. “Yes sir. I love it.”

That’s what I want to hear. I started some swivel action with my hips. This one’s going to get the load quickly . . . and since some other top’s on the way, that’s probably a good thing. I put one foot on the bed and start pistoning in and out, sliding my slick meat in and out of his pussy, making it my own.

“You’re big,” he says, taking another hit of the poppers.

“Damn right I am.”

“Fuck!” he says. I take it as a compliment. Then he says it again, in a normal tone of voice. “Fuck. Sorry. I’ve got to pee.”

“What?” My sex trance is shattered when the guy hops off my dick, flips around off the side of the bed, and gets to his feet. He pads into the bathroom and runs the water. And I stand there. Naked. Dick hard, pulsing, and unsatisfied. I figure he’s running the water to get the bladder going. It works for me sometimes, too. But he’s taking fucking forever, while I stand there with a dick that’s leaping up and down. When I peek around the corner into the dark bathroom, I can see him standing over the toilet. So at least I guess he’s not doing anything shady.

But still.

Eventually he comes back. “Feels like I’ve gotta pee, but nothing’s coming out,” he tells me. Flops down on his back. Puts his legs in the air. “Fuck me,” he begs.

I’m back to square one. I slide in that hole, amazed again by its heat and velvet interior. My dick is back to its full stiffness; I start sliding in and out. In this position he’s tighter. He’s clamping down on my dick hard, and gripping onto the head and the last inch for dear life whenever I pull out.

“Fuck!” he says, stopping that scene even before it starts. “I’ve gotta pee!”

Then he’s up again, and I’m holding my dick, and thinking to myself, Jesus fucking Christ. I don’t really care how convenient is the locale. I don’t care how hungry the guy said he was for some dick in his hole. I’m beginning to think I don’t really give a damn that his hole is a hot one. All I know is that being interrupted twice in five minutes because this asshole has to pee is pretty fucking irritating. If he does it again, I’m thinking, I’m just going to leave. While he’s in there standing over the toilet, I’m going to slip on my shorts, put on my sneakers, and walk out that door. What’s he going to do, chase after me down the hall with that ratty jock falling off his ass? I think not.

He’s back again. “Get on your knees,” I say, my brusqueness coming solely from the fact that I’m pissed off at him. He groans slightly when I push into him for the third time. Ticked off as I am, I can’t deny the fact that I like the way his ass feels. I mean, fuck. It’s unfair that I know nice guys with holes that aren’t half as fuckable, while this asshole’s wandering around with the best hole I’ve dicked in ages. And I haven’t even been able to do anything with it yet.

I’m fuming as I fuck. I’m barely concentrating on the sensations at hand, even though from the moment I’ve shoved inside him, my dick’s inching to orgasm. I can hear he’s grunting to himself as if I’m causing him pain. And sure enough, he’s pushing himself up with his hand. “I’ve gotta. . . .”

I’ve got my hands on the reins of his jock. I let go with one to shove him down again. “You can pee all you fucking want after I’ve gone,” I tell him. “Until then, shut up, man up, and take the fuck.” And then I hold him down while I pound.

He must be able to tell how irritated I am with him. He lies there, face in the mattress, whimpering, mouth gaping like he’s developmentally challenged, eyes rolling in the back of his head. Meanwhile, I fuck and fuck and fuck. This is where I get mine. I go in deep, angle my dick to the side on the pull-out, and thrust in again to give my head the maximum sensation. I don’t care if he fucking pisses on the bed. All I know is that he’s not getting up again while I’m there.

“You got something for me?” he asks softly when he hears me breathing harder.

“Yeah,” I mumble. “I’ve got something for you all right.”

I shoot hard. The bed rattles against the wall; the mattress shudders. I dump the load inside his guts, right up that slimy cunt. Then I stand there while he milks my meat with his hole. Fucking slut. I knew his need for cum would override his fucking bladder.

I pull out. Watch my cock slither back and point, still long and half-hard, toward the floor. I grab my sweat shorts and step into them. Slip into my sneakers. It’s only a matter of seconds and I’m ready to go.

I open the hotel door. “Now you can pee,” I call back over my shoulder.

I don’t bother to wait and see if he does.

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Too Many Questions

When it comes to online hookups, it’s usually pretty easy to tell whether the other guy is serious or not. Usually it boils down to one thing: whether they ask too many questions, and about the wrong things.

This last Sunday I placed an ad stating I wanted to give head. Nothing complicated. Nothing too weird. I said I just wanted to walk in, take down a guy’s pants, suck him to completion, swallow the load, and get the hell out. (Okay, I didn’t actually state the very last part. I hoped it would be inferred.)

After I’d discarded the overwhelming number of replies over my photo that of course read with variations on, Hot dick! You should let me suck it!, I was left with a couple of promising possibilities.

I wrote the guy who was most local first. His first reply had asked, Are you looking for now? I wrote back that I was indeed. What’s your body like? he wanted to know. Are you fat, fit, overweight, what? I wrote back that I was six-three and a hundred and sixty-five pounds, and that I was actually pretty lean, as he should have been able to tell by my photos, which had been taken that morning. He wrote back another email saying Well I don’t want you showing up and seeing you’re a fat slob.

Are you looking for now or not?, I wrote. He wrote back, I notice you didn’t answer my question about whether you’re a fat slob or not. Photos can lie you know. At this point, I figured the guy was just dicking me around. Out of politeness, I wrote him and said that I had in fact answered his question in my second email, that my photos were current, and thank you, but I was going to look elsewhere.

Five minutes later I got another email from him. So are you looking for now or not?

I didn’t answer. This was not a guy who was going to hook up.

A guy down I-95 seemed a little more promising at first, when he sent me an email saying he could host all afternoon and needed someone on his big dick soon. You got any more pics?, he asked when I wrote and told him I was available at that moment. When I sent pics, he wrote back, Any more? Face? I pointed out that I’d sent a face pic in my last email, and sent another. Any pics of your ass?, he wrote.

I wrote back declining to share one of those, because he wasn’t going to be seeing my ass, much less doing anything with it. You got any videos of yourself? he wanted to know.

I just stopped answering.

The last guy was a Puerto Rican kid. Early twenties. Fucking hot, from his photos. Huge dick. I mean, easily nine inches of uncut skinny dick that he said he wanted sucked. I could cope with that. Are you free now?, I asked.

Do you have more pics?, he of course asked. I sighed, considered just signing off and going about my business, but in the end gave him a chance and sent a few mixed X and G shots. He replied with a few more of his own, which at least gave me slight hope. Are you discrete? was his next question.

I replied that I was very discreet, and used the correct spelling. How far away are you?, he asked. I told him it was no more than ten minutes from my place to his. Will you suck me deep down? he wrote back. I sighed, pretty sure that every new email was reducing my chances of actually seeing that Puerto Rican dick by about twenty percent. But I told him I’d suck him deep down. Can I take a video of you sucking me? was next.

Look, I’ve got about ninety minutes, I wrote him. Do you want me to come over and suck you now, or should we put it off until later?, as in never, I was secretly thinking. But then to my surprise, he gave me his address and told me to text him after I’d parked. I was out the door like a shot before he changed his mind.

The area in which I live has these odd and unpredictable outcroppings of granite that jut out of the earth like giant building-sized teeth; they’re massive fuck-yous from some ancient glacier that just dropped them millennia ago. It’s easier to construct urban areas around the damned things than excavate or destroy them. And this guy’s apartment building, I found out, was build atop one of the rockiest and highest plateaus in the city. I had to park at the bottom of his street, walk a steep incline to his parking lot, walk another incline to his building, and only then did I see him coming toward me—down a long and twisty staircase. I’m not totally out of shape. I do a lot of walking. But I was already winded from the uphill climb, and when I saw I still had another small-sized mountain to scale just to get to the door of the apartment building, my heart sank. But I followed him up and even assayed another flight of stairs to get to the second floor.

By the time I was finally in his apartment, my heart was pounding like I’d undergone an old-fashioned stress test at the doctor’s office. “We have to get it done before my roommate comes back,” he whispered to me.

“When’s your roommate back?” I asked. He shrugged. Which didn’t allay my anxiety level, let me tell you.

Now, as I said, in his photos the guy was hot. I mean, super-hot. In person . . . not so much. I didn’t get a general sense that his photos were old or manipulated. I think he merely photographs spectacularly well, given his looks. Which weren’t ugly, exactly. But they surely weren’t pretty.

I wasn’t there for his face, though. I yanked down his gym shorts and got my mouth on his dick. “Suck it deep,” he commanded. Not a hard order to follow, since he was soft. I ran my tongue around the inside of his foreskin and took him down to the root, slobbering over his dark-skinned stick and letting the tip of my tongue tickle his nuts when I hit bottom. He started to get hard almost instantly.

“Get naked,” he whispered.

I took my mouth off his dick. “I’m not getting naked if your roommate is going to walk in at any second,” I told him.

“Show me your dick,” he begged. I was just wearing a pair of flimsy sweat shorts. No underwear. Big cock ring. I let the shorts fall around my ankles, and showed him my hard dick. “Show me your ass,” he pleaded. I complied, then started to kneel between his legs again. “Come on me,” he whispered. “Cum on my dick and lick both our loads off.”

And then—I’d been in the apartment maybe for all of a minute and a half at that point—he started to dribble a very small load all over himself and the carpet. Mostly the carpet. I stood there, still half out of breath and astonished at the lightning speed with which this kid shot, just kind of gaping at him. “Come on me!” he said again.

Well. I might as well get some kind of nut out of it. I stood between his legs and beat at my dick. “Hurry,” he ordered. Because that’s the way to get me feeling sexy, of course.

I let go of my cock and stooped to pull up my shorts. “I think I’m just gonna head out. . . .”

He cursed en español. “I got cum on the carpet!” he yelled. “Fuck! I’m going to be in trouble!” Like he’d been stung by hornets, he jumped up and ran to the kitchen, presumably for something to wipe up with. He returned wild-eyed. “You gotta go! My roommate’s gonna be home any time!” It wasn’t even until I was out the door that I thought to check for my keys. Luckily I had everything.

Gentlemen (and ladies), learn a lesson from me. Sometimes it just behooves you to honor your instincts. And sometimes it’s just doesn’t pay to leave your house. Even for a nine-inch Puerto Rican cock.

Friday, August 2, 2013

Adventures in Craigslist

I recently decided to give Craigslist a try again. Twice, in fact. A couple of local friends of mine had claimed great success with the m4m ads there, and something about the site has to keep compelling people to come back, right?

I guess none of you will probably be surprised at all to hear that my ventures into the East Coast of Craigslist-land were just as spectacularly unsuccessful as in the midwest. Oh darn. I’ve gone and given away the whole plot of this entry!

Many of my readers know that although I’ll follow just about any road that leads to sexual adventure, there are still a couple of areas unexplored. That’s mainly because they’re unusual enough that it’s difficult to find a partner to help out with them. One of these, of course, is my oft-shared fantasy of being blindfolded and restrained by a bottom I trust, and then of being used as a top by that bottom—or, in my more wild imaginings, by a number of unknown bottoms. A kind of reverse gang-bang, if you will. I’ve had several guys offer to put it together for me, but so far no one’s pulled through. (Will it work if I sigh heavily, gaze off into the distance, and say, I guess nobody loves me? Because although I dislike passive-aggression, I’ll queue it up if it works.)

What I decided to advertise on Craigslist was a variation on that theme, essentially. I wrote an ad asking for someone to play dominant bottom to my submissive top. Now, having control, and exercising it, is part of my daily diet as a top. I’m used setting the pace and the agenda of a tryst; I’m totally accustomed to telling my partner what I expect of him and how he should accomplish it.

I utterly get off on knowing that when I give an order, it’ll be obeyed. And it will be obeyed. I feel territorial pride about the holes I fuck, and I love knowing that if there’s anything I want from a guy, all I have to do is tell him. He’ll comply. Asking a bottom to dom me isn’t merely something that rubs against the grain; it’s almost so much against my natural instincts in the bedroom that it’s unimaginable. Forbidden. Definitely erotic. Ceding control, a quality that as a natural top I prize, has the tang of the taboo.

So I wrote up the ad. Included my stats. Stated plainly that I was looking for an assertive bottom who wanted to control a top. Included a photo that showed the most of my assets, by which I mean my smile, of course. (And my junk.) Very clearly said that I’d only be replying to responses that were relevant to what I was looking for. And I stated that furthermore I’d only be replying to guys who included photos with their response.

Twice I did this. Twice. In one of the largest Craigslist markets out there.

And in response I got:
- Approximately thirty-five responses from guys saying i want u to hold me down and facefuck the shit out of me;
- In the area of twenty-five to thirty responses that said hot dick r u dom?;- About twenty replies of dubious relevance that didn’t include a photo;
- Another dozen that contained face pictures that looked like they’d been culled from the FBI Most Wanted bulletin board in the post office; and,
- Three offers to make money from home safely and easily with no investment required!
Out of all the responses I had to my ad, exactly one seemed suitable. A guy in Brooklyn sent me some shirtless photos that would’ve made any of my readers sit up and take notice. He was fit, furry, and masculine. He had a meaty, round ass. He was all bottom, he told me. He’d had fantasies of having a top who’d do his bidding in the sack, and who’d wear a leather collar and call him dad. He wanted to be in control. He could host.

Well of course I replied back to the guy. We swapped two emails and batches of photos, and he told me he’d be back in touch when he got back from his vacation.

Then I never heard from him again.

Ordinarily I’d be positive about the results. I did, after all, get a reply from a hot guy I liked who seemed to understand what I was looking for. He didn’t follow through, but hey. I was close. That’s encouraging, right?

In the wake of over a hundred replies, though, that one near-miss isn’t even looking too hot. Maybe I’ll try again in the future and hope for a new batch of Craigslist viewers. Maybe I’ll try somewhere else.
Or maybe I’ll just set aside the scenario as the stuff of fantasy. If it’s ever meant to happen, it’ll happen.