Sunday, August 19, 2012

Sunday Morning Questions: Summer Vacation Edition

I just wanted to let you guys know I'm going to take a brief vacation from new blog entries—the rest of August, that is. There are three reasons I'm taking the break: one is simply because I've got family visiting for part of that time, and I know from experience that trying to sneak in some blogging time is rough under those circumstances.

Another is because this is the time of year when my readers are vacationing as well, or simply huddling by their air conditioners, and I feel like I'm typing in a vacuum.

And the third reason—and I confess it's the most emotional of them—is because I found myself having a bit of a bad reaction to reader responses to Friday's entry about The Runt. It Hurts was an entry into which I poured a lot of time, and I was pretty proud of it until the moment it hit the web. Then my first two responses were along the lines of "Send me a picture of the Runt" and "Can I have a picture of the Runt?", followed by a I-guess-it-was-supposed-to-be-funny "Pics or it didn't happen." Not Thank you,  or I really liked the entry, or even Good morning, how're ya doing? Just demands for pics.

I'd started the day out bright and cheerful, but I let a few thoughtless assholes reduce me to a grumpy stompypants. When that mood didn't lift until sunset, I figured a short vacation would do me good.

In the meantime, I'll queue up some popular older entries that some of you might not have seen before—and which others of you might graciously pretend not to have read on a previous occasion.

Thanks to those of you who've been sending me photos of your assets for the Readers Assets feature. I've got a good few of you ready for the next couple of features—but I could use more! If you haven't shared photos of your cock or ass with my readers yet, and you want to, check out my plea behind the link and send me your photos!

I'll still be around on Facebook, Twitter, and via email, and I'll be trying to use the time to catch up on my backlog of correspondence. See you in September!

And now, a few questions culled from my profile.

Have you ever done it with a tranny?

You know, for the longest time, I would not have sex with a cross-dresser of any sort while he was wearing women's clothing. I like fucking women, and I liked fucking men. I didn't have any philosophical objections to cross-dressers, and I loved my transexual and drag queen friends, but I didn't really have any sexual attraction to a man in woman's clothing, for some reason.

After encounters a few years back with a couple of female-to-male transsexuals, however, my views on sex with people outside of traditional gender norms began to change. I enjoyed a couple of meetings with a muscled guy who liked to dress pretty for me, and with a few other men who liked to make themselves attractive in women's clothing, and whatever had been holding me back in the past from taking that step seemed to have been erased.

If you ever wanted to post a photo of your bare feet on your blogger page I know one follower that wouldn't mind :-)

Oh man. My feel are nothing special. They're just large!

"Oh man. My feel are nothing special. They're just large!" That just makes them even sexier!

Awww, thanks. They're size 11, by the way. Not clown feet.

Bottom question: What size is too big for you?

These days, anything over a pinky is too large for me. And I'd be eyeing that pinky dubiously.

In my bottom days the only cock I turned down was the largest cock I've still seen to this day; it was about 13 inches long and roughly the thickness of my forearm. It was also hard as concrete, with no give. I tried to suck it and couldn't get my mouth around the thing. Then I tried to bend over for it, thought the better of that rash decision, shrugged, and apologized for changing my mind.

The guy was okay with it. Apparently with his size, he rarely fucked because of the issues of getting it inside anyone's hole.

Do you think tattoos are sexy? If yes, which ones are the sexiest?

I think tattoos are very sexy, though I'm too wishy-washy to try to pick out one for myself. I went through a phase (the same phase as all the guys who got them, I guess) during which I thought tribal tattoos were very hot and erotic . . . I don't think so now, however.

The tattoos I tend to think are sexiest are those that involve writing on the skin. When I see a tattoo in script, or in a fancy typeface, and it's more than just MOTHER or a VENGEANCE or a single word emblazoned on the chest, I want to read it and know the person better. I think that's very sexy.

Do you smile or laugh during sex? Or do you have one of those "serious faces?" Or . . ?

It totally depends on the guy, the mood, and the situation. I think in my most natural state, I tend to be very playful during sex, and if the guy's of a similar mindset and is articulate and responsive, I'll joke and talk and hope we leave with grins on both our faces.

At the same time, I have absolutely no fears or hesitations about being the serious top, the grim top, the aggressive rapist top who takes what he wants and holds back nothing, or the serious romantic. All of those are elements of my personality, and can be summoned with the right stimuli.

Maybe someone who's had sex with me could better answer the question.

Do you have some favorite singers or groups who are *not* popular or mainstream? Who is it, and what sort of a genre is it? Do you remember how you found them?

Absolutely. No one ever listens to my stuff.

Unfortunately for my reputation, a lot of the crap I listen to is either Swedish pop music, or the tunes a British schoolgirl circa 1983 would've been playing on her Walkman. A man can't salvage a reputation built entirely on Army of Lovers and owning every Bananarama 12" single in existence.

Why do you think so many people want to know if you've ever been busted whether wanking or with another person?

I don't think it's anything personal; I don't think I give off a vibe of "Oh, he's so careless he must be busted ALL the time."

Instead I think it's simply a pretty common fantasy that men have—specifically passive men who prefer to masturbate and fantasize rather than go out and get it. They don't want to hunt down a three-way with a man and his wife, so they fantasize about getting caught by the wife and forced to do all kinds of unspeakable acts. They don't want actually to initiate sex with someone they've fantasized about, whether it be a family member or a nun or a teacher or a stranger in a bathroom.

For men who are too fearful to act upon their urges and have actual fun, I think this fantasy of being 'busted' has a few powerful charges. It sexualizes what they already perceive as shameful or even criminal, and it puts them in fantasy situations in which they have no choice but to admit to and act upon their forbidden urges. The fantasy makes the uncontemplatable, unavoidable.

For someone like me, who just does whatever the hell he wants, it's simply a mystifying and weird obsession.

No, I've never been busted. I can fucking hear the sounds of cars in the driveway and footsteps in the hall, moron.

I recall that you received the 2010 cast recording of A Little Night Music a while back. Do you have favourites for stage musicals? Any reason for your choices?

Yes, I do. I've loved all kinds of theater since I was a kid, musicals included. I'm not particularly apologetic about it, either. So here's a few long-time favorites.

I love She Loves Me for the sweet score and the unapologetic romance—plus the plot's been used in at least three movies (The Shop Around the Corner, In The Good Old Summertime, You've Got Mail) and is pretty indestructible. Candide is a favorite because I love the score, and the same for the more obscure The Grass Harp, which is based on one of my favorite novels.

Sometimes I'll have a fondness for a musical because I love a certain performer. So I like On a Clear Day You Can See Forever and The Apple Tree because of Barbara Harris—and Barbara Cook was in all three of the musicals I mentioned in the previous paragraph, come to think.

Some other favorites: Little Shop of Horrors, Hedwig & the Angry Inch, Once on this Island, 110 in the Shade, Bells Are Ringing, and The Full Monty. I also have a soft spot for Mame, the all-African-American production of which was the first show for which I played in the orchestra.

So yeah. As unfashionable as it is to admit, I'm kind of a big Broadway hound.

It seems to me that you like fulfilling other people's sexual fantasies. Do you have any of your own fantasies that remain unfulfilled?

Yes, absolutely. I've stated before that the one fantasy I have that has never been attempted, much less fulfilled, was of being restrained and blindfolded and then serviced and forced to top a bottom guy who could do anything to me he wanted. Or more ideally, a bunch of anonymous bottoms.

Guys always say "I'll do it!" But they never do.

Do you think your sexuality was shaped by your experiences or do you think you would have had an attraction to men if your first sexual experience had been hetero?

The logic behind this sort of question seems to imply that if a kid encounters a homosexual early in his life, he's 'imprinted' in a way that can't be shaken—and that if he'd encountered a good, decent girl, he'd be an upstanding heterosexual instead.

Sexuality doesn't work like that.

We like what we like. We seek out what we like. If I'd wanted to have sex with a girl, I would've sought out sex with a girl. I wanted sex with men, so that's what I chased after.

My earliest sexual impulses came as young as kindergarten, when I had vivid fantasies—not explicitly penetrative, but all of them involving nudity—with some of the daddies of the other kids on my school bus. They weren't a result of any contact with a homosexual. They were my own. Of course my sexuality has shaped my experiences throughout life—that's absolutely undeniable. However, my sexuality isn't something that happens to me, while I stand by as a passive observer. Nor should it be.


  1. Dang Rob--big feet and nice hairy legs to boot. Thanks for waking up my Sunday morning!

    1. That photo makes my legs look like tree trunks. But thank you!

  2. Well, at least you don't have guys on xtube berating your partner's body or your ethnicity... As if I somehow misled them despite the tags and the title (bear breeds Asian hole). I think people are just curious now that the runt has shown up on several posts now. I have to say, though, that post in particular was sharply vivid in prose.

    Funny thing is my partner and I sometimes say "hurt" to each other in a pleading voice in reference to a trick he had years ago where his bottom uttered the word over and over despite being rock hard and loving it. It's usually in reference to a guy with a big package... Or being really horny and wanting a good, no holds barred pounding. We say it as a bit of a joke, but man you know how to turn that friction between pain and pleasure into a fire!

    1. I'm sorry. My mind wandered off after 'bear breeds Asian hole.' What were we talking about? :-)

  3. OMG, "The Grass Harp"? Karen Morrow's huge "Babylove" number always blows my mind. I always wondered why that show NEVER gets staged, but apparently its book is a mess (Capote's novella hasn't really been successfully adapted to any other medium, in my opinion, but I do love the original, too).

    1. John,

      I would respectfully disagree—I really love the 1995 film version. Not just because it reunites Sissy Spacek and Piper Laurie on screen again (not to mention Lemmon and Matthau), but because Mary Steenburgen is a pretty awesome Babylove.

      But yes, the thirteen-minute "Babylove Miracle Show" number is pretty freakin' amazing. The whole score is lovely (although the syncopated horns make it sound a little bit like The Love Boat theme throughout), but I've heard the book is a huge mess.

  4. I wanna marry and roll around in this post. One of your best Q&As, even if it is made up of old material -- new to me.

    Ended on the perfect note too.

    Big fan of Little Shop as well btw. There should be no shame in admitting a (good) taste for theatre.

  5. Don't let anyone turn you into a grumpy stompypants. You know there are people like that in cyberland and have run across them before and will in the future.

    Have a good time off and that sand looks more coarse then California sand.

  6. "A man can't salvage a reputation built entirely on Army of Lovers and owning every Bananarama 12" single in existence."

    Thanks for that. It made me LOL.

  7. Babe,
    The Runt post was absolutely *beautiful*, a really moving and powerful read for me (and I'm sure for others!), and I'm so sorry to hear about some of the responses to it... I loved it very much and won't ever forget it. And you know I mean that.

    As for the rest, I have only two things to say:
    1) My "musical" debut was playing the love interest in a school production of "Once On this Island" [and I was fucking hawt]. So it cracks me up that you're a fan.
    2) Seeing Audra McDonald in the Bway revival of 110 in the Shade a few years ago (my fated summer in NYC, actually) was one of the most memorable show experiences of my life. I love that you love it.

    And now, all I keep thinking is that I want to see a show with you.

    Huge hug.

  8. Dear Mr Steed,
    I LOVE to read your blog and hope you get a lot of mileage out of being a "stompypants." I laughed when I read that. Take a well-deserved break and your return with new material will be much appreciated.
    Hugs and kisses!

  9. "grumpy stompypants!". I love it

  10. I don't often comment here, because, well, I'm not someone that often comments on things.

    However, I wanted to let you know that you're a beautiful writer and I absolutely enjoy your blog. In fact, I often save up new entries that pop up in my RSS feed for a time when I can really enjoy them.

    So, enjoy the blog vacation, I know from experience that people often need them, but come back to us afterwards refreshed and with more of your excellent writing and hot stories!

  11. Two things I would like to ask of you:

    1) Please enjoy your vacation

    2) Believe me when I tell you for every gnat who tries to steal your joy with demands there is me, the avid but far less vocal reader, who wants nothing more from you than the wit & wisdom you share in ever post.


  12. I'm sorry that I don't read your blog as often as I should. I love everything you've written or posted and I also want you to know that I, too, feel the same as Mark above.

    Enjoy your rest and vacation.

    Please don't let someone steal your sunshine. It's yours. Own it.