Sunday Morning Questions: The 46-Year-Old Popper Virgin Edition

In what's becoming a regular feature here, I'm devoting today's space to catching up on anthologizing some of the questions asked on formspring.me, in the last couple of weeks. As always, if you've got questions, feel free to use the handy entry box to ask whatever you'd like. If the question hasn't been addressed before, I'll try to get back to you in a timely fashion.


Does it matter to you if a bottom moans or is pretty much silent?


I prefer a responsive bottom--one who is honest at cuing me in on what he's experiencing. Whether that's through body language or dirty talk, I don't care.


Getting an honest answer to this is probably impossible but hear it goes. How much of the stuff is real?

I change names and very minor details. It's easy to get an honest answer on this issue, though: I don't make ip the sex, the people involved, or the encounters. I have another career in making shit up. My journal is for real.


Do you ever use recreational drugs, specifically hallucinogens ?

The only drug I've ever used recreationally was a single Viagra. It gave me a headache. I am completely a virgin to any other recreational drug, and rather prudish about them in my presence. Yes, I'm aware of the irony about me having the right to be prudish about anything.


Do you enjoy poppers?

I will confess quite shyly that I've never used poppers before. I'm virginal.

Shut up.


Do you have any regrets in life as far as sex and men?

Interesting question. Of the six worst days in my life, four had to do with sex, so there's an argument to be made that had I avoided sex or squelched my sex life, I might have avoided those four very bad days.

Those were four low days in 46 years, however. I've had many more good times than bad, and learned ablot about other people in the process.

So no. I might regret having had those bad days, but I wouldn't do anything to take them back if I had to give back the rest as well.


If you have a half a degree, is there anything of which you have a quarter? What about an eight? A sixteenth?

I am one-sixteenth German, one-eighth of an inch shy of grazing my head on the ceiling of my car, and hung like a quarter horse.


When you masturbate, do you ever cum in a glass & drink your cum to the last drop?

No. Getting a glass requires too much pre-planning. I just eat it from my hand.


Are you afraid of aging? or rather, what's your view on aging in the gay community? everyone seems to want to stay young forever nowadays...

I'm not immune to a desire to stay youthful. Though I don't bake a fake tan on myself, dye my tips, and cover my body with A&F logos and hope I pass for twenty-six, I do take time finding clothes that flatter me. I groom. I moisturize. I don't fib about my age. The only way to stop growing older is to die, and frankly, I'm not ready to do that yet.

Many men assume that their sex lives are pretty much kaput after forty, however, and I've found the reverse to be true. I've had more younger guys after me at my current age than I ever did in my twenties and thirties. Like youth itself, I'll try to enjoy it while I can.

But god forbid I should ever turn into one of those leather-skinned Hollister-wearing clones who is eternally thirty-nine on his online profiles. (Says the hoodie- and Converse-wearing guy in the jeans, T-shirt, and baseball cap.)


After reading your blog, I'm honestly intimidated by you. I can honestly say this is the first time a top has made me feel this way, and I'm afraid I may not meet your standards. Is there anything you can say to comfort me?

I would say that if you read my blog, you'd have noticed I have a sense of humor, a good perspective, and that I can be very tender with the right person. That in itself should put you at ease.


What's the one thing that you've thought about for a long time, but never tried, sexually?

The list is vanishingly small. I've tried a lot of things. I have a fantasy of being restrained by a bottom, though, and being helplessly forced to fuck his holes against my will. Or a group of bottoms. Kind of like a reverse gang-bang.


Have you ever permitted a third guy (naked, non-participating, voyeur only) to witness your having sex with the second guy?

Oh sure. I'm all for it. I enjoy putting on a show.


Has anyone ever mentioned you have a down-to-earth quality about you that makes guys want to do things for you?

My friend, that is what the experts call 'playing to your strengths.' I am no model. My body is not gym sculpted. I am not hung like an elephant. Nor am I 24 years old.

I am, however, friendly, down-to-earth, knowledgeable, and have a great sense of humor. And I'm a top. Combined with my experience, letting people see those qualities keeps getting me laid.